Monday, November 30, 2015

Begin..commence...initiate...launch...start...

Start
Verb-cause (an event or process) to happen.
Noun-the point in time or space at which something has its origin; the beginning of something.

Today is a miserable rainy cold day here in Virginia.  I did not wake up to work out but rather rolled over and turned off my alarm before it had a chance to go off and slept in until 7:45 am.  I spent the day yesterday getting Christmas going in or home.  It was a must as the two year old keeps asking..."Is my christmas ready?"  Breaks my heart every time!  So today I decided I was going to delay my start and enjoy the day putting snowflake flannel sheets on the girls' beds, setting up the winter village that the kids love to look at, and watch a movie with my four year old.  I did not launch myself into this week but instead took a step backwards.

I was reminded last week how my first start on this journey to a stronger me was the Monday before Thanksgiving in 2001.  That day is forever imprinted on my brain as the day I decided to start.  I went to my first Weight Watchers meeting and the leader praised us all for showing up the week of Thanksgiving.  Not waiting for the new year was a huge thing for me...I felt that a change could begin prior to January..I started just hoping for the best.  What I was able to accomplish in those few short days prior to the year set me up for a strong jump into my journey.

I just sat here and went through my food journals from that first year of weight watchers.  It consisted of puffins ceral and milk, english muffin with peanut butter or rye toast with some butter for breakfast.  Soups and sandwiches for lunch always with chips of some kind.  Salad and protein for dinner and a few random nights of pasta.  There was ALWAYS dessert on each day and sometimes more than once.  Some things have not changed.

The start of my day every day is Maple and Brown Sugar Wegmans Weight Control Oatmeal and one cup of decaf tea.  Every day!  Ben made french toast this weekend...I had oatmeal.  I know I love the flavor of it and I know it will hold me until lunch so there is no reason for me to go a different route.  Lunch is always fairly routine...anything in a roll up with either avocado or sour cream involved.   Dinner is salad and protein still.  I save my big pasta nights for a big workout day.  I know how delicious pasta and sauce is and it is definitely a treat when we have it.  Something I work hard for so I can truly enjoy it.  Oh dessert...how I love you so. Every night consists of one cup of slow churned ice cream.  It is something that my husband and I have turned into our nightly ritual.  We have the dishes done, the breakfast table set for kids and we retreat to our bedroom with our cup of nicely measured out ice cream.


Every day that we are given is still a new start for me.  I still use the daily ques to keep myself in line.  My kids will ask do you need the kindle to log your food or are you headed down to the treadmill...can I play while you run?  I need to be reminded of that start and how hard it always is for me.  The first five minutes of my run each time are not wonderful and I usually want to turn around but when I finish I feel like I have conquered the day.  I also know that starting over is way more difficult than staying where I am.  Every choice is a hard one...I am choosing which hard I want to face each day...and yes it is still a daily choice.  I was tired of sneaking the Halloween candy that I had in the garage that we were going to get rid of...I had to ask my husband to take it into work today...I could have shed these five pounds a month ago if that candy was not here.  If it's here...I will eat it...I won't buy the stuff but I will definitely seek it out in my own home if I know it exists!

Jan 2014-Jan 2015

Start today-it will be scary, annoying, lonely at times, frustrating, tiring but it will also be rewarding, exhilarating, life changing, inspiring, and beyond words worth it.  People will see that you are making this change and results will happen and you will inspire.  You will have people asking what you are doing, how hard it must be, and you can smile to them and say yes it is hard and it is exhausting but it is so very worth it!

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