Why does one tri...

Last Saturday was a success.  I finished my first Olympic Triathlon and did it well.  I was joined by three friends who were equally amazing in the stellar day!  I think back to my lack of ability to swim and breath at the same time and just smile at the progression I have made.  While on a relaxed training swim the Friday morning prior to our race my friend and training partner Mike and I were floating on our back in the middle of a lake and just were laughing out loud!  What we have changed in our world and how we are now choosing to go through it is at times humorous!

I am "tri-ing" for me.  I am tri-ing for my kids and my family so that I can be stronger and show them that you are important and you need to make time for you.  I have done running races and a few triathlons but I am always blown away by the people and effort at these events.  The camaraderie that builds with complete strangers over the course of the day just makes me happy.  It makes my effort and time spent over the past weeks worth every early alarm, cold water swim and humid bike ride.  This whole journey is not about seeing how fast I can run or what speed I bike at....although fun to see my improvements over the course of my training...but it's about me and the deep down reasons why I choose to push myself.

My buddy on this journey is my friend Mike.  Mike will be forty this year and is married to a wonderful woman and dear friend Laura and they have two great kids who are close in age to two of my kiddos.  We have had many a meal with our families together but it was one meal last year  around November 2014 that moved Mike in more ways than one.  Neither of us remember the details around the discussion but it concluded in "Sure, let's sign up for a half Iron Distance in October of 2015...we've NEVER done that before...should be a great time!?!?!"

Mike and Me post Luray Olympic 2015

April of 2014 Mike and Laura were delivered some news that no one wants to hear or have to share with those that care so very much for them.  Laura was diagnosed with breast cancer.  I can remember the day she sat at my kitchen counter and told me like it was yesterday and I wish that day never happened.  I knew she was a strong women before but a year after this whole treatment and recovery she might be the strongest woman I know.  I don't know first hand but I would imagine that when one is faced with this those that are around you feel the need to be equally strong or even stronger if that is possible.

With that Mike decided that he needed to make a change.  He needed to TRI for Laura and his family.  He needed to change something that was happening in his life...he needed to find an outlet for him with all that was swirling around him.  Mike signed up for a half Iron Distance Triathlon and in the two races I have completed with him so far...he has ROCKED it!  He had never done a race of any kind...I remember him saying to me prior to that night of drinks and food...that his body is just not meant to run...ever.  Mike is also signed up to run the NJ Marathon with me in May of 2016.  Sometimes things just change...and change although hard and complicated...can be really good.

Mike is tri-ing for himself and since December of 2014 with all of our training and his amazing determination...has lost over 50 pounds and is following the training plan day by day.  He is a rockstar and he doesn't even know it.  We wake up early to get our rides in...we swim side by side in our neighborhood pool cursing each other for coming up with this idea as we both swim in our pink caps.  We text each other after a workout to say that was miserable...good luck to you!   We are tri-ing together and for each other and our families.  At each race the excitement that we both feel is at a record high, we give each other a hug...we know that we've got this.  I am pretty sure Laura is next to join in this craziness...she is already running on the treadmill and has a bike on the trainer in the basement...we are one pool away from a new girl in training.  Did I mention she is the strongest person I know!

We have fifty two days til our big race of 1.2 mile swim, 56 miles bike, and 13.1 run.  After completing the hills of Luray we feel like the flatness of Wrightsville Beach may be okay.  My hubby and our coach ensures us every day that we are on the right path, we trust in his plan, we know that we are doing amazing things and we will have a great day!  We know that the support of our families and the example we are setting for our kiddos is all worth it.   The new people that we have become are bigger and stronger than anything we imagined.  We finish things and know we can get to the next day...even with a smile on our face.

So October 17th...watch out for two very giddy, nervous happy people that will be ready to crush 70.3 miles.  We are going to tri our best for us and for anyone that thought this was not possible...and on some days that may even be us ;)

Embrace the Suck...choose you...and as our coach says...sTRIde on!!!

Getting nervous...and scared...and I'm TIRED!!

Is anyone else exhausted!!!??!!!  Summer is still going strong here with only three weeks left...we always think how are we going to survive this with the kids...then mid way through you are wishing you did more with the family....then the end comes and you are treasuring every last moment...letting them stay up late, eat large bowls of ice cream and making sure to take that last road trip!  And through all of this we still have to negotiate showers and who played with what toy first...and if you eat this you can have that.  The bickering and the arguing is definitely coming to a high point and I am just crazy crazy crazy tired of it all!  I love my children and love my hubby but some days...yesterday being one of them...I needed a break.

In the past that would be a easy turn for me to hit up a quick candy bar in the check out aisle of the grocery store or buying a special bag of cookies telling the littles that are shopping with me that this is a special treat...when in fact it was my stress eating and they were just a part of it.  The countless time I would binge on something HoRrIbLe and bury it in the trash are too many to remember.  I would never of taken this frustration and stress and turned into anything positive.  Someone also shared the other day that STRESSED is DESSERTS spelled  backwards....GO FIGURE!!

So with this I try my best to keep my focus.  Having  an exercise daily plan is a huge help for me...there is no question as to what I am going to do each day and no question if I am going to do it.  It happens.  No excuses...no maybe later...it just happens.  My hubby and usually have our last conversation of the night being...what do you want for dinner tomorrow.  We think of what our exercise is for that day coming up and decide if it can be a low or high calorie dinner...tonight is chicken parm...YUM!  I know that this is a bigger meal so it keeps me on my toes throughout the day...that and many nalgens of water to keep me full!!

2009

I started training for my half iron distance 17 weeks ago and my second "test" for my training is this weekend my first international distance triathlon.  I will swim 1500 meters in open water, 41K (25.5 miles), 10k run (6.2 miles.)  I am scared, nervous and VERY anxious.  Open water swimming is a new thing for me and the hills that I will have to ride on will make every muscle in my body sore.  I have worked every day of these past 119 days.  They say it takes 21 days to form a habit...guess that is true!  This is me trying to be a better stronger me and seeing what these past 17 weeks of training have led me to.  My first experience with triathlons was back in 2008...and let me tell you I did the swim BACKSTROKE!  I had no business being in that pool but there was a part of me that wanted to give it a whirl.  Two other sprints happened quickly after those...and I really enjoyed the multi sport aspect of it all.  

Back to being scared...I have run many miles...no worries there...but the speed on the bike in this hilly town has me very very nervous.  In my training ride out there I was going about thirty miles an hour and that was with me breaking and not in "race mode."  What is a mom of four kids with a crazy messy house doing going that fast on a tri bike in the hills of VA...she is holding on for dear life to not cause any harm to herself or others and just focusing on finishing without a wreck!  The swim will be hard not for the distance but the large corral of people that are in this lake with me.  I have heard many crazy stories of people swimming on top of others in these races...just hoping I can keep to the sides and stay away from the masses.  The focus there will be on breathing and just finding that next buoy to swim to!

It's all hard and scary and nerve racking.  Everyday is a struggle with the mind and body whether you are training for an upcoming event or just trying to make it through the day.  It is all really really hard.  My friend yesterday said how crazy it is that I am doing all of this...she then confirmed it was crazy in a good way.  So yeah I am definitely crazy...I know that I have to be.  I have four kids ranging from 11-2....I have a husband that is training for his third Ironman...and I decided to hop on the even crazier train and do a half iron distance in October!!  I know it's all crazy...but for me...it's how I keep myself going.  I need the wheels of my brain and body moving at all times or there will be too many opportunities for laziness and giving up to sneak in.  If I have a plan I will follow it...If I have a mission...I will lead myself there.  I would be tired if I was doing all this or if I wasn't...we are all tired and we are all getting through it day by day.  The choice is to let the horse run all over you or get back on it.  I have chosen to ride this horse and direct it where I want to go!!

Have good thoughts on Saturday morning as I "tri" it again....and hope for a safe and successful event for all participants!  Life is short...we are supposed to enjoy the ride!!

Embrace the suck...choose you!

Transformation isn't about hiding...

I was flipping channels the other night and came across the show Extreme Weight Loss with Chris Powell.  This show is basically Biggest Loser but just focused on one person and they show the transformation over the 365 days.  There are three phases to this process and the first is 90 days of bootcamp with an amazing coach in Colorado.  The girl that was chosen was a former UCLA cheerleader that had reached 309 pounds at the age of 37.

In the taping they show her coaching her team in California of high school cheerleaders and then Chris Powell shows up as a knight which was the team mascot but also I suppose her knight sweeping her away to safety.  This young girl was then asked to step on a scale in the middle of the football field in front of her girls which she has been leading and remove her shirt in the process.  She was nervous, scared and excited all at once...but definitely petrified to remove her shirt on television and bare it all.  

Chris Powell had some amazing words that he said in this crucial moment of her life...
"It takes a ton of courage….Transformation isn’t about hiding, it’s not about protecting the addiction, it’s about exposing it. And once you bring it to light it’s not going to control  you any more. No one is going to judge you here.  Nothing but love and unconditional support here."

After my post this past week with my before and after fifteen years apart I received many positive comments and many on how proud I should be of the person I am today.  Some couldn't believe how brave I was to share such a drastic comparison publicly.  I suppose I am brave but I really wanted people to know that change is possible.  I have no clue how much I weighed in that picture because scales weren't in my game plan at that time but I would guess I was probably at my heaviest ever.  A year after that pic I got married and started my first transformation.  I found that new person at 23 years old and felt strong.  Transformation should just be my middle name for I definitely had to work at making these changes again and again after every baby.  It was nothing I was ever shy about or tried to keep hidden.  It was a way of life.

So now I share this so that someone can see that even though you may have been stuck in that same hole for more than a year now, you have the tools to dig yourself out of it.  Once you are ready and tell yourself and believe it that you can make the change it will happen.  When you have the support system around you to keep you believing in you and pushing you along the way, it will happen.  You have to be willing to take that first step towards the stronger, positive, healthier you and away from the negative disruptive you.  Everyday I want to push myself to stay in this zone...as tired as my legs may feel...I will still get on the bike today.

I really hope my courage of sharing publicly, much like that girl on EWL, will make a difference in that one person's belief in themselves.  My story is an open book with dark, gloomy scary chapters and ones filled with butterflies and sunshine.  I am not hiding where I came from or where I am going and writing this all down helps me keep it exposed and keeps me going.  I am now in control of me and can steer myself down whatever path I choose...that is a wonderful feeling.

The girl on the EWL show ended up losing 175 pounds!!  She was able to let herself shine as she felt it had been bottled up for so long...she was literally glowing at that final weigh in.  A year of no joke hard work and pushing herself to the ends of her own limits found her in a place she had only dreamed of being.  It was amazing to watch.  She embraced the suck that was every workout, healthy choice, early wake up call, recovery post late night binge, and mile ran.  She gave it her all.


Embrace the suck...choose you!

All signs pointed to change...

I have been thinking a lot lately about the me before I first ever made a change.  I remember doing Atkins diets in college and then a week later just eating pasta for every meal at the dining hall followed by a chicken sandwich from the local pizza house at 1am after a full night of drinking.  I don't really remember becoming heavy and losing control I just remember needing to make a few purchases of new clothing and stretching out a lot of old clothing.  No one in my life was saying anything one way or another so I just kept going with business as usual.  College was supposed to be fun and I was having it!

I have stumbled across this picture so many times when looking for some before pictures down in the basement and I just couldn't bring myself to share it.  Then I said today if I still have that old bathing suit I will try it on and do a before and after pic.  I was 22 years old in this pic and on my senior year spring break with my girlfriends.  I was very comfortable in my own skin and now looking back still happy about that.  Happy that people didn't make me feel unhappy.  I remember the chocolate buffet night on the cruise ship....that was my favorite night!

2000 vs. 2015

I don't think that I am better person because of the choices I make today verses the choices I made 15 years ago.  I do think that I am a healthier, stronger, happier and a better example for my now four children.  I remember when I went to one of my early OB/GYN appointments when Ben and I were first married and my doctor said to me..."Wow...I really don't believe you weigh as much as you do.  You don't look like you do.  Let's get your thyroid checked out."  I had never even heard of thyroid issues and didn't think we had that in our family history but if it meant there was an answer to me being heavy...I was all ears. The doctor seemed alarmed so I guess I should have been too.

I went and got my blood drawn and can remember the doctor calling me to say that all was great with my thyroid...no issues there.  I remember calling Ben to tell him I received the results...and the answer was I was just heavy.  Growing up I was not heavy but merely a big boned athletic built girl.  I was definitely the bigger girl in the class but nothing to what I brought my self to at the age of 22.  That phone call was pretty devastating.  A change needed to happen.

I don't remember the date of that testing but I know it was before we were trying to have kids.  I remember sitting in the parking lot and crying.  I remember thinking that this was a ray of hope and I was in the dark again.  

So enough chatter from my girlfriend who lived out of town who was having success with Weight Watchers and I decided this was going to be my method of change.  I can write things down, I can weigh things, I can read sides of boxes, and I can exercise a bit.  It was not rocket science and the basic principles of in verses out were finally right in front of me...It was time for a change...I was ready.

This is not me saying I am perfect or made all the right choices.  I know still to this day I have struggles.  Lunch the other day of leftover brownie/chocolate chip cookie muffins from my son's bday celebration with a side of reeses pieces is not success.  But it is life.  My daily food logging and exercise may be a bit over the top for some people but for me it works.  It has worked more than five times of me tackling a fairly large weight loss pre babies, in between babies, and post babies.  I tried it based on a whim from a friend and it gave me the tools I needed to be ready to battle those pounds when they crept back into my life.

And now I sit in a place where my goal has been met...still with perfect viewing to the other me...knowing she can creep in at any time.  I still look at my body and there are things I would like to change.  Food doesn't scare me in that I think I can't control myself around it.  I know that if a day gets out of hand it's only one day.  I have had success too many times to let one day of failure kick me out.  I wake up the next morning, get my workout in, eat my oatmeal, and log my stuff.  It is what I need to do to keep me in the zone.  One of the most amazing things that has come out of this whole transformation is that I now look forward to my exercise on most days and the thought of trying out a new fun recipe that may be vegetarian when we would have never tried otherwise...is exciting.  I get excited over being able to handle the changes and challenges my body is going through and want to see what it will be capable of next.  

I am putting it all out there with this picture to really show you that a change can happen.  You can start the process and keep it going even though life events may derail you over time.  You can get back on the wagon and keep pushing.  You can try a little harder every day.  It is scary but you are not alone...your support system is there waiting to help you along the way.  As those little changes stack up and before you know it you are having BIG results.  Things will get easier, you will feel better on the inside and out...and everyone around you will see this new you.  You will shine!

Embrace the suck...choose you.

Hoping for the best

Eleven years ago today I became a mom.  I was 26 years old, married to my college sweetheart and ready to welcome a beautiful little baby girl into the world named Reagan Leigh.  I had my baby shower with family and friends, "sugar and spice and everything nice" and prepped and nested till my heart was content.  We were ready to welcome into the world this healthy little baby girl.

Headed to the hospital and was just very excited that the day was finally here.  I was so excited to have a little baby girl while hubby was still warming up to the fact that there was not going to be a football thrown immediately with this pink bundle.  My doctor had checked on me at around 7am that day and then was back just before 12pm and said I was ready to go.  I can here my doctor saying...come on Reagan.  Ben and I both had our pink going home outfits to match little baby girl's outfit.  We were ready!

Well...people are not perfect and that day how ever many months earlier...the lab tech was having an off day.  She told me baby girl and in fact there was a bouncing baby boy waiting to meet us.  It was quite a shock and a story that still makes me smile to this day!  Out came this 8 pound little boy and my doctor said...It's A BOY?!?!?!  His voice was so funny....like oh no...they were wrong!  Ben then may had mentioned the size of certain things that may swell during delivery...but then had the biggest smile on his face I can ever remember.  All of his fear and anxiousness over a little baby girl were put to the side and his excitement and joy for a baby boy were pushed to the front.  He felt like he could handle a boy for the first time through a bit easier.

Surprise!!

So here we were with this baby boy...that did not have a name for two days as we never came to an agreement on a boys name...so I referred to him as buddy, mister, cutie pie and baby boy.  My mother in law's boyfriend came in with a HUGE pink balloon and when we told them it was a boy he said...holy crap!  and quickly exchanged his balloon for a blue one.  We received a showering of blue, green and red onesies with footballs, teddy bears and trucks in the mail via family and friends.  When I tell you we did not have one stitch of green or yellow...it was all pink and purple.  All was switched out at home before we made our arrival.   Reagan was never on the name list for any of our other children...that ship had sailed.

So here he is today...eleven years old and becoming this strong, smart, determined young man.  He is faced with challenges far greater than I did when I was his age...it is a different time.  As I want him to stay little forever, want to snuggle with me and read a book or ask me to play a game with him...I know those days are few remaining.  He is typical first child, wanting to help me out as much as he can, do his best in all aspects of life...trying to be the number one.  He does well in school, loves to play sports, is the funniest and silliest kid around...and all together a good kid.  I can only hope this will last.

He was given the spirit award on his summer swim team this summer.  He is not the fastest kid in the pool but gives his all at every meet and has the look of defeat when it doesn't go in his favor.  He has the same competitive gene that I do and I suppose that is a blessing and a curse.  The spirit award is for the kid that supports other members on the team, motivating for others, helpful to those that need it, respectful to coaches and other teammates, and a rule follower.  I will take that over the fastest swimmer any day.  For all the pressures that he has around him...for that to be something he is remembered for...I am beyond honored.  

Eleven years went by pretty quickly...I am not in a rush for him to grow up any faster because once he wants to stop playing cars with his baby brother, or let his sisters do his hair and dress him up...it's over.  He will be this big kid in this house...his voice will lower...his shoes will get bigger and bigger...and I can only hope that he will still want to snuggle every once and again.

Starting a family is a exciting yet frightening thing...one I can't believe I did at the young age of 26.  I was naive and scared and did my very best...I had all the guilt of being a working mom and not being there on his first birthday when he took his first steps at daycare.  I tried to get him involved in sports and activities I thought he would like and schedule playdates and meetups to keep him entertained.  My husband and I were this team that was starting to create our bench and he was our first pick...a surprise pick...but the still the first member of team G!  It was the best times of my life.

Now as I sit typing and he watches his shows on his birthday morning all sprawled out on a chair that makes him look longer than he actually is...I am beyond words proud of him.  He has become this mini version of my husband and I with a zest for life and humor that I don't always get but still appreciate.  At 26 I was hoping this would all be easy and fun and at the eleven year mark...I can say it was not all easy or fun but definitely worth it.  We will continue on raising this little man boy...and hope for the best.  Hope he continues to make smart choices and does the right thing.  The controls are shifting with every year he ages...that's okay....or so I keep telling myself.

Embrace the suck...choose you...and sometimes you just have to hope for the best!

It just takes one day

Each time that I lost weight over the years I got myself to the comfortable place where the pants I had in my closet fit again and I didn't feel GROSS anymore.  It was many days and weeks of writing, logging, planning, exercising and convincing myself every morning that I could do it.  There were times between each of the pregnancies that I didn't get back to that initial starting weight but it was close enough because I knew another baby was in our future.

I was chatting with my best friend a few weeks ago when we were lucky enough to get some time together and she said in her best friend voice, that yes Julie you are a little extreme.  The strange part of me was kinda happy to hear that...especially from her as she has known me through all my shapes and sizes.  When the person that knows you best sees that this is a new stronger you than ever before...it has to be the real deal.

It just takes one day for you to wake up and tell yourself...today is the day.  No more excuses.  One day to put on the workout clothes and do more than just go to Target and Costco in them.  One day of grabbing a measuring cup and seeing how much pasta you are having with dinner.  One day of going to bed early so you can wake up early to get to the class at the rec center in the morning.  One day of a friend saying let's sign up for a 5k and you agreeing.  One day of telling yourself that you have not truly committed to finding the new you and today is the day of true commitment.

In January of 2014 when I said enough already...I was ready for the change...even though I was not sure what I was going to uncover.  I had a goal in mind but over the past six months I have blown that goal out of the water.  I have pushed myself to new levels and trying new things.  Fitness is a huge component of my daily life with training for my 1/2 Iron Distance.  I can't look at the eight and an half hours I have to finish in a week and think this is impossible...I will never be able to run that far or swim that long let alone find the time to get it all in.  I have to just break it all up into pieces and tell myself I can do that one piece.  The next day...same thing...I can do this one piece of the giant puzzle.  
So through this process I fit into my clothes that were in my closet and then I needed to buy new ones.  I feel better on the days that I push myself extra hard and find its easier for my mind and body to make the smarter choices in the kitchen.  I am able to eat more and cleaner with the new me.  I don't feel limited or deprived.  I know what I need to do for success and I take it a day at a time.  It is still a challenge everyday to not eat three waffles with my kiddos and a big glass of milk but rather enjoy my oatmeal and decaf tea.  Those waffles smell soooo good!    When meatballs and spaghetti are on the dinner table I have the garlic bread too and probably more pasta then I would if I wasn't measuring it out.  If I know I can have it and it works into the day...it's on my plate!

So yes...one day...try to log your food...see what you are taking in.  One day...go for a walk or try a class at the gym.  One day decide that you are worth more than you are telling yourself.  When you start to feel good...everyone around you will too...it makes for a happy place.  Then when you wake up the next day...try again.  You may not have immediate success but don't give up on you so quickly.  It took more than a week to get you to this unhappy place so it will more than likely take you more than a week to get out of it.  Days will be long and hungry and tiring...but you will be able to do it!  The next day you will be proud of this new you that is creeping out and you can do it again!  Small changes add up to AMAZING results!

Embrace the suck...Choose the hard...one day at a time!!

New Additions...remembering mine with a smile

A friend of mine today had baby number three!  She had asked me last week if I could come over and throw two french braids in her hair so she didn't have to deal with the knots and tangles while laying in a hospital bed for the next three days.  She was already thinking of this baby first and how he would need all the love and attention she could give and her hair was just going to have to take a back seat.

I went over this morning around 8:30 to get those braids done before taking two of mine to camp and she was there...very calm about to have a baby in just six hours.  She had her other two clothes laid out on the table for the helping hands to easily find in her absence.  A swing was put in the corner away from all the toys of the older siblings so maybe this new addition can have a little bit of quiet time.  Life as usual was going on all around this pending new arrival...you could feel the excitement in the house.

They were blessed this afternoon with a healthy baby boy and I am sure she is taking all the time to look at those cute little toes and long skinny fingers.  Smelling that baby's head was always my favorite thing in the world to do.  And after having my third I really loved my stay in the hospital while family watched after the other two.  I am hoping my friend truly enjoys those quite moments in the hospital before her man on man defense turns into zone.

As I wished her well before I left this morning she said I am sure you don't miss all this...and the fact that you get to wear regular clothes.  In that moment, with all that excitement in the air...I did miss it.  I know that our family is complete and there will be no more Gs added to our six pack. It does make me sad that that phase of my life is now behind me...I still am changing diapers but they are not cute little swaddlers that actually smell good...I know bizarre that I like the smell of diapers-prior to use of course!  We pass through these phases so quickly and don't even know sometimes that we have left one behind.

Each of my four babies brought so many new and exciting things into my life.  Yes I gained fifty pounds with each child...ate a lot of salty meats and craved all the cheeses I was not allowed to eat while pregnant...but I really loved being pregnant each time.  My first I was told he was a girl according to the sonogram...out came a bouncing baby boy-that was a tough one to wrap my head around!  My second was the little girl that I tried to have in the same timeline as G1 so I could use all those cute little girl clothes I received at my baby shower three years prior.  G3 was exciting as the older ones were now aware of the process and getting excited to be helpers.  Our family was getting bigger with every big belly that appeared in our home.  When G3 arrived I was so excited that G2 had a sister...something I always wanted.  And then G4 arrived after putting me on bedrest for a bit, he was almost telling me to slow down before he arrived...and he made the perfect bookend to our family.  He has brought all that fun and silliness that a boy can bring that we haven't seen in a few years as they were covered in princess dressups and nailpolish.

As my kids are getting bigger and doing more mature things I at times think that I am staying stagnant in my life...however my birthday seems to still come every year so I guess I am getting older.  Those days of sleepless nights due to feedings and a house filled with cute little plush toys and playmats are far behind me.  My aunt has always said...bigger kids...bigger problems and as my oldest are just 11 and 8 I know that I haven't even touched the edge of this iceberg.  Time moves on and as slow as the days can be I do know that these years are going quickly.

G1-G4

So the joy and excitement that my friend is feeling today as she lays in that hospital room with the beeping machines and she jumps up as her baby is coughing trying to clear his throat...it's all new again.  That is an excitement many are lucky enough to have more than once and I still look back and treasure each of those first quiet moments.  I don't long for those days but I do look back upon them and have a huge smile on my face.  I loved becoming a mother.  It was worth every bit of sacrifice that was made over the 36 months of pregnancy and 48 months nursing and then the years in between trying to find the me that was hidden in this exhausted body!!  I have managed to resurface a stronger woman than I went in...and one that has learned many lessons through these four kiddos.  There wasn't too much suck that I had to embrace over those early years...I was very fortunate.

Kiss your kids, hug your spouse...remember that excitement and love you felt...and sometimes take those moments and play them in your head when you are in fact embracing the suck that is the day to day...and hopefully it will make you smile.

Congrats to the O family...enjoy that new bundle...I can't wait to smell his head!

Embrace the suck...choose you!